Love Lessons from Carrie and the girls...

One of my favorite women posted this on her blog and let me "steal" it and post here...thanks Rach! You ROCK!

BTW- There's a lot of truth in the post below...so, for all you women out there (and men too...) pay attention to the wisdom from SATC :-)

xoxo~d

Love Lessons from Sex and the City

In their six years on the air, the SATC chicks endured the good, the bad, and the totally bizarre when it came to dating. Cosmo studied some of their most memorable relationships to find out what we could learn from the fabulous foursome.
By Ashley Womble of Cosmo

Case study: Miranda and Steve

When Miranda met bartender Steve Brady, she was skeptical as usual. He was nice (and easy on the eyes) but clearly not relationship material. Not surprisingly, their divergent careers created problems: conflicting schedules, fights about money, and different outlooks on life. Miranda could have deleted his number from her BlackBerry, but ultimately, his laid-back personality and devotion won her over. The unlikely pair started a family and eventually tied the knot.

Lesson 1: Date against your type.

Case study: Carrie and Aidan

Hot furniture designer Aidan was everything Carrie thought she wanted in a man: emotionally available, honest, and ready to commit. Aidan wanted Carrie to meet his parents, have the keys to his apartment, and eventually be his wife. She attempted to change by quitting smoking (and nixing her addiction to Mr. Big), giving country life a shot, and wearing his engagement ring around her neck. But no matter how hard Carrie tried, she couldn't commit to any of it. While Aidan seemed perfect on paper, he wasn't the ideal guy for Carrie.

Lesson 2: Don't change for a man, no matter what.

Case study: Charlotte and Trey

An optimist with a very romantic view of love, Charlotte believed her dreams had come true when she was literally rescued by the single, wealthy, and handsome Dr. Trey MacDougal. Despite some major red flags — a lackluster marriage proposal, a meddling mother-in-law, and a sexless honeymoon — Charlotte was determined to make the relationship work. Although she gave it her all, their union still failed.

Lesson 3: Never ignore the warning signs that tell you a relationship isn't working.

Case study: Carrie and Berger

Witty writer Jack Berger had these famous last words for Carrie, written on a Post-it note: "I'm sorry, I can't. Don't hate me." After the abrupt end to their short, rocky relationship, Carrie vowed to spend the same amount of time getting over her breakup as Berger had spent ending it. If only it were that easy. Though Carrie managed to avoid him, she ended up melting down in front of his friends, which undoubtedly got back to him. She learned that it's better to face the music (or in her case, the Post-it note) and get it over with.

Lesson 4: As painful as breakups can be, you have to mourn before moving on.

Case study: Samantha and Smith

Samantha's dating philosophy: "I'm a trysexual. I'll try anything once." Her only rule was to never fall in love. She was so set in her man-eating ways that when she scouted and seduced a gorgeous waiter at a raw food restaurant, she didn't even ask his name. She encouraged the struggling young actor to play out his sexual fantasies and took him under her wing professionally, changing his name to Smith Jerrod and making him the Absolut Hunk. Somewhere between sex and stardom, Samantha fell in love and eventually confessed to Smith, "You've meant more to me than any man I have ever known."

Lesson 5: Dare to fall in love.

Case study: Carrie and Mr. Big

Sure, Carrie might have done some of the chasing, but in the end it was Mr. Big who showed up at her door the day she left New York City for Paris. Angry that his timing was always off, she screamed, "Forget you know my number! In fact, forget you know my name!" But he didn't give up. He called to tell her he loved her, and fortunately, Charlotte was there to answer his desperate call. The next day, he met the ladies for brunch and admitted, "You're the loves of her life, and a guy would be lucky to come in fourth." With their blessing, Mr. Big went to Paris to get "their" girl.

Lesson 6: Let him chase you.

Case study: Carrie

The eternal single girl had her share of romances, chronicled in her weekly column, but the truest love story is the one she wrote for herself. Bad luck and messy breakups were de rigueur in Carrie's life. By surviving the pitfalls — a Manolo-mugging, a computer crash, and a very embarrassing fashion fall — Carrie gained the confidence and strength to continue her search for true love. "The most exciting, challenging, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself," she said. "And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous."

Lesson 7: Be fearlessly single.

Prayers: Answered or not?

Lately, I've been praying for God's will; to use me in the way I'm meant to be used. In addition to that, I've been praying for my own personal wants. I've been praying and praying, and hoping for a certain outcome to a situation that I've been dealing with, and today I recieved a resounding NO...loud and clear. Trust me when I say it's not what I wanted. I was angry at first. I was upset, I cried for about a half hour. Then, after thinking about it, the answer became clear. The answer wasn't a resounding No, but a soft yes. I asked for God to use me the way I'm meant to be used, and He's doing exactly that. It may not be the way I wanted to be used, but that's where God's will and our wants come to battle. Just because I want something, doesn't mean it's good for me, or right for me. If it's not in God's plan for me, do I really want it? Should I really want it? Even if it's not according to my plan, I should be happy that my prayer was answered according to His plan. And after much thought and prayer, I am. I accept His will and His plan for me, even if it's not what I wanted or planned for myself.

Just something to think about...

COMBAT...

I did it. I conqured COMBAT Triathlon today. I did NOT let it conquer me. I woke up this morning, before many of you, and by 7:00am, had recieved my chip, gotten body marked, stopped by the bike tent to get plugs, and was standing by the pool ready to jump in.

The first event was swimming; by far my weakest event. But, as I stepped into the pool area, and realized that I had likely swum double the length in training, I started to feel a little better. I COULD do this. I was second from last to jump in, and I swam the best I could...there were a few times I had to walk, but I mostly swam all 300 yards...I even left two people in the pool after me! My goal time was 20 minutes, my finish time was 9:52...yeah, insane! I don't know that I've ever done 300 yards continuously like that before! WOO HOO!

After that, it was time for the biking event. I had to tear off my swim cap and googles, somehow manage to dry off a bit (although I've now learned that towels and being dry are overrated!), pull some socks on, throw some shoes on, but let's not forget to put on the helmet and click it BEFORE doing all of this...I would have been penalized for even touching my bike without my helmet on! Take a swig of gatorade, and off I go...running my bike past the hot pink mount line...15 miles, here we come!

The biking was insane. The wind was strong, but the cloud cover was nice. The TCPD had all the lights flashing, so it was nice to run a flashing red light and have everyone stop for me...The first leg seemed to be going ok...until I had to go over the Holland St. overpass. I clicked in to my lowest gear, and my quads screamed! I think I invented a few four letter words too (sorry Mom!), because that hill was brutal! Finally, what I thought was the hardest part was over...boy was I wrong! I was now riding directly into the wind, for literally 10 miles maybe? This is where I seriously thought about dropping out of the race. I had passed another cyclist a few miles back, and by the time I looked around again, the SAG vehicle was behind me...this is where I didn't want to be...the last cyclist in with the SAG vehicle. I had to start willing myself to pedal, and by God's grace, I did. Made the turn around, and headed back to College of the Mainland, where I heard a HUGE roar of cheers and encouragement. All the finishers had come to line the cycle chute in, and were cheering for me to ride strong and finish. That, I did! I was so overcome by emotion, I started crying before I even got off my bike. I dismounted at the hot pink dismount line, ran my bike into the wrong row, picked up, racked it, took off my helmet, put on my race belt and fuel belt, grabbed my hat, and ran out of the transition area amid a thunderous roar of more cheers and encouragement. I don't know if that crowd will ever really understood what they did for me!

Ok, now to the 5k..running out of the three events is my strongest, but I was soooo tired, I couldn't run anymore, so I walked the entire 5k. At that point, I didn't care. I just wanted to finish. I never stopped, although I seriously wanted to. I had a great conversation with God along the way, and really learned what I was made of. At one point, I did feel like I was going to pass out, but I literally just kept moving, even though the SAG vehicle was STILL behind me, picking up the course. All of a sudden, I heard "GO DAWN!!!" I looked up and saw my fabulous training group BAM waiting for me...the people who had encouraged me all along in notes, and training rides, were right there waiting on me again. As soon as I heard that, I started to run. I really have no idea where the energy came from, but there it was, and I used it to run to them. As much as I wanted to stop, they wouldn't let me, but they did let me walk a little once I got to them...they just kept up with the constant reassurances that I was ALMOST done...and when I saw the finish chute, another burst of energy (and tears) started...all 400 competitors were lined along the chute, yelling for me, cheering me on, and out of no where I heard "DAWN (insert last name here), BAY AREA MULTISPORT, A JOB WELL DONE!!!!" As I crossed the finish line, I jumped up and hit the banner. I was done. I conquered COMBAT and did not let it conquer me I AM A TRIATHLETE!

Yes, me...the girl who was always picked last to be on the team in gym class. The girl who was teased for being the slowest runner. The girl who HATES to sweat. I overcame the fear, I overcame the nervousness and anxiety, and I finished that race: 300 yard swim, 15 mile bike, 5k run/walk. Despite the lack of training, despite the obstacles, I've now done something that NO ONE ever thoght I'd do...all thanks to GOD! And I finished in less than 2:30 which was my goal time!

YEA ME!

Creepy...

I have a stalker. Yes, I'm serious. I call him my psycho stalker because he messes with my head. If you've known me for any number of years, than you've heard about him. I'll give you the back story.

I met him in junior year of high school while on a school orchestra trip to New Orleans. He was staying on the same floor of the same hotel, and you know how that goes. The floor was filled with high school students from all over Houston, and we all started hanging out with each other and what not. We hit it off, exchanged phone numbers and kept in touch.

We kept in touch for a little while, until he started calling 3x a day every day at the same time (2:30, 4:30, 8:30)...every single day. I started avoiding his calls, because it was getting very weird. Soon they stopped, but once senior year rolled around, he started calling again, once a month to ask me to his prom. EVERY MONTH. I said no, and kept saying no, until April rolled around and I realized I had no date. So, out of desperation for a date, I accepted the date to his prom on the condition that he'd go to mine. And it went downhill fr..om there.

We won't rehash my prom or his, because again, if you've known me for a while, then you've heard the "Prom date from hell" story.

Ok, fast forward a few years into college...sophomore year to be exact. I get a letter that has no return address in a bright yellow envelope. It's from him. Telling me that he's moved out, and has his own place now, and I can come visit whenever I want...and then every other line is: i miss you, you can come over whenever, or call me, even if it's 3 in the morning. i miss you, come over. i miss you...

I didn't write back.

Then, while on some holiday break, he calls. I have my male cousin answer the phone and pretend he's my boyfriend to give the Psycho the message. I'm not interested, leave me alone.
Guess what? He wrote me again...a few years later, I'm out of college, and teaching, living in Clear Lake. He sent a card to my parents' house. It was a beautiful card talking about how we've been such great friends all these years, and a handwritten note about how much he misses me and hopes that we can continue the friendship, and that I'll write back...he INCLUDED the SELF ADDRESSED STAMPED envelope and paper to write back on.

I didn't write back.

2006 rolls around...I'm one of the contacts for my high school reunion. My info is out in the world for classmates to get a hold of me...guess who finds me...yep. He sends me an email, and I think to myself, you know, it's been 10 years. I've changed, I'm sure he has...let's see...so, I email him back. Things are going fine, he SEEMS normal, all is well. But, I have my guard up. We email back and forth for a while, talk on the phone, but then he stopped calling and emailing...no biggie for me.

Until December 2006. That's when he crossed over into creepy. He started with the i miss you's and i have all these feelings for you, and i'm not crazy, you're the only one i can talk to, i need you, no one listens to me but you. He was supposed to go to my graduation, but after all that, I asked him not to go, and quit contacting me. i let him know flat out that he made me uncomfortable, and that "this" whatever "this" was, was over. no more.

Guess what...I think he showed up to my graduation. After I crossed the stage, I got a 5 minute voice mail from him saying that I coulnd't stop him from showing up, and if he wanted to be there, he'd be there...he went on for 5 minutes pretty much yelling into the phone.

Yes, I've contacted the police. It's my understanding that because he hasn't tried to hurt me or come near me, I can't do anything about it...

I've heard from him a few times since then, when his dad died, and other random emails, and I havne't responded to any of them.

He texted me on Friday from an unknown number, and once I realized who it was, I again asked him to leave me alone. He continued to text me saying that he was hoping I'd changed my mind, and when i replied that I hadn't, he said "you should." WTF? Some more texts transpired after that, but oh well.

I'm very creeped out by all of this. Bottom line, I'm changing my email address and cell . It's not changed yet, but it will be soon, and if you are priviledged enough to get it, do not share it without my permission.

Please just keep me in your thoughts and prayers...

love you all!

Mt. Evarist

Quietly, she stands. Ever so strong, but beautiful. She doesn't let anyone take advantage of her, and will let you know once you have. She brings out the best in everyone who comes near her. She's like the flame to the moth; people are drawn to her gentleness, kindness, and heart. She's a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand, and will be brutally honest with you. Oh yeah, she has an aversion to BS too :-).

She never says a word, just watches everyone, and offers opinions or advice when asked. She gives and loves unconditionally regardless of if she needs it more. She's kind, she's loving, she's hilarious, and pretty damn smart. She's put up with a lot in her 53 years of life, and despite the hardships she's faced, she's handled them with beauty and grace.

She's Mt. Evarist, and she's my mom.

Happy Mother's Day Mom! I LOVE YOU!