ugh...

it's 10:36pm on a sunday night. i'm on summer break, and rather than celebrate the fact that i'm summer break, i'm lying in bed, slightly peeved that i missed out on hanging out with friends this weekend. this doctorate is SERIOUSLY putting a damper on my social life. i've had to miss out on pool parties, lunch dates, birthday celebrations, and despite the 4.0 that i'm currently happy about, not much else to show for it. i know in the end, it'll be worth it...but in the mean time, i'm seriously not happy with this program. family time has drastically been cut down, friend time has been drastically cut down...me time has drastically been cut down...and i'm not doing my usual 'wait till the last minute because i work much better under pressure' routine...i'm ACTUALLY reading the chapters, and doing the research, and not BSing my way through class as i have in previous programs. i'm ACTUALLY putting forth the effort. and i'm not having fun...well, i do when i'm with my class and we're goofing off, but in the mean time...it sucks. i miss my life, and i miss my friends.

:-(